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Download PDF Memory's Last Breath: Field Notes on My Dementia
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Memory's Last Breath: Field Notes on My Dementia
Download PDF Memory's Last Breath: Field Notes on My Dementia
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Product details
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Audible Audiobook
Listening Length: 9 hours and 40 minutes
Program Type: Audiobook
Version: Unabridged
Publisher: Hachette Audio
Audible.com Release Date: June 13, 2017
Whispersync for Voice: Ready
Language: English, English
ASIN: B071ZJCRPB
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
3.5 Stars†And the longer life goes on, the fewer are those around to challenge our account, to remind us that our life is not our life, merely the story we have told about our life.â€--Julian Barnes, The Sense of an EndingA now retired scientist, Gerda Saunders was 61 when she was diagnosed with early onset dementia, specifically, micro-vascular disease. This memoir is her thoughts, fears, frustrations over the following years, the affect it had on her, her husband, her children, and daily life. From forgetting to include “necessary†garments to struggling with minor to more major concerns. When to give up driving. When to say “no more.â€As the author is a scientist, it shouldn’t come as too big of a surprise that this has a more clinical approach than other books I’ve read on this subject, the majority being fiction, but not all. I was hoping for a bit more of a personally involved perspective, but this has a bit more of a detached, clinical approach than what I was hoping for. She does talk about how everything affects her in a clinical sense, she just doesn’t talk about how that makes her feel, even her stepping into areas of frustration seem removed and aloof. I understand that as a person, but as a reader it kept me from feeling connected. This is the one thing that didn’t work as well for me. For me – that doesn’t mean it won’t work for you. This is really a very well balanced book in terms of showing you both the scientific aspect and the more human side of life, when that life is fraught with unpredictable lapses of memory, of understanding, of those moments of panic that set in when we feel trapped by something and can’t figure out way out.Saunders memoir covers quite a bit of territory and includes a blend of research studies further clarified in terms of how it affects someone on a daily basis, along with the memories of her youth, growing up in South Africa, amazing stories including their move from South Africa to Utah. I loved reading about her quest to determine which telling of a story was the most accurate one, which sibling, or parent, neighbor, etc. remembered the accurate numbers and who did what. These areas are where this book really was lovely, a blend of real-life to focus on a real person instead of the academic nature of research. There is some discussion of her literature, Iris Murdoch, Shakespeare.â€Murdoch’s own relation to words, speech, writing, stands testament to her conviction that there is no self without language, no route to ‘ultimate divinity’ without the mediating power of words.â€There are heartbreaking moments in this, as clinical as these thoughts are at times, sometimes she lowers the protective field and lets the reader see those moments when she clings to these moments when life is still good. When a hug from a grandchild is enough to remember reasons why life still has its “good enough†moments.Also included are her “Field Notes.†Among these are notes on the frustrations of the day.â€Dementia Field Notes, 7-26-2014: The other day I put my bra on over my pajama T-shirt.â€Through these you can sense a bit of the day-to-day struggle she lives with and how they range from a simple frustration to frightening ones.The fears of becoming one of those physically alive but mentally no longer involved are examined, with inclusions of thoughts of others, authors, scientists, quotes from Song of Solomon to Jonathan Franzen. Research into the field of Physician Assisted Dying, much like I read about in Deborah Ziegler’s “Wild and Precious Life.â€David Shenk, author of “The Forgetting: Understanding Alzheimer’s†shares a thought “the unique curse of Alzheimer’s Disease (AD) is that it ravages several victims for every brain it infects.†This is a truth too often overlooked. It is usually avoided as a thought until it is unavoidable. No one wants to think of this happening to someone they love. No one wants to think of this happening to someone in their own family. It’s a life changing disease for everyone involved.
This book may be a bit puzzling at first due to its unusual format but it quickly becomes fascinating, lucidly informative, and ultimately emotionally wrenching as a brilliant woman shares her lengthy struggle to stave off and adapt to dementia.
If you are looking for a self-help book or a testimonial about the blessings of dementia this is not the book for you. If you want a wise hand to hold while observing /feeling your way into the bizarre ways a brain can misbehave, also connection to an author's generous heart as she makes meaning and resolution with a life's past and present--if you'd like a hug of shared humanity as the writer forms peace with the indignities of fierce mortality--you should buy Saunders' book now. I'm fortunate to have read it.
After writing several essays about her early onset dementia, Gerda Saunders was encouraged by her colleagues that her work could become a book and indeed it did. It is MEMORY’S LAST BREATH: FIELD NOTES ON MY DEMENTIA. A great mind, an intellectual, a college professor, a writer, Saunders wanted to document, through journaling, what was happening to her, so that readers, her family, others suffering from dementia, might gain a better understanding of not only what she was going through, but how her brain was slowing down, how she was gradually losing her short-term memory, and how rapidly.Her ability to do this is remarkable. Imagine sharing your thoughts and fumbles, all part of the territory, so openly. Here is an inside look at a disease that ravages the brain, which you have no control of. Saunders shows us her personal stories through her diary, her background growing up in apartheid South Africa, anecdotes that have a wonderful touch of humor throughout, as well as scientific information that dissect, if you will, the brain and explain the four lobes and the how and why of where we get information and how we lose that information. She is quite frank about the moment that she knew that she needed to retire from her job, everyday tasks that have now become difficult for her, situations both humiliating and terrifying where she has had to be rescued from, the list goes on.In MEMORY’S LAST BREATH, the author shares more than just her inquisitive mind. She shares her quest for knowledge, her love of life and family, how art and literature play key roles in her current situation, her sense of fashion and not giving it up even if her attempt to create a mnemonic code to help her with her wardrobe fails, and knowing when her life will not be the life she wants to keep living as she poses the toughest questions to her family so that they clearly understand what quality of life means to her.Whether or not you know anyone suffering from dementia, the book is enlightening and certainly provides powerful insight into a disease that affects millions. If you do know of someone suffering from the disease or someone who has a family member who has dementia, I highly recommend reading it, not only to better understand just how devastating it is, but to comprehend the pain that the family and loved ones endure, watching, as Saunders says, the mind “go away.â€Â
Poignant, lyrical, honest and thoughtful, Memory's Last Breath is truly breathtaking. My favorite memoirs are those that provoke smiles and tears simultaneously, and I was not disappointed here. Gerda's compelling truth, interwoven through past memories and her present day making-of-memories to leave behind as her legacy to her loving family, truly touched my heart. I fully recommend this outstanding book to anyone and everyone who has been touched by dementia. And honestly, who hasn't been?
In this lyrical, beautiful book the author interweaves elements of memoir, science, and an anthropologist-like accounting of her daily life in the land of dementia. Her honest and unflinching narrative elucidates not only the struggles in her day-to-day existence but also her grappling with the larger question of how to resolve her identity now that the 'good brain' which was so much of her self is failing her. A truly courageous and inspiring book.
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