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Do Your Divorce Right: Straight Talk From Family Court Judges, by Andrew Horton John David Kennedy

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Review

This well-written book is many things. . . . Anyone who wishes to be well-informed about the legal, emotional, and financial aspects of divorce should read it.~Gaetano Ferro, Esq., President, American Academy of Matrimonial LawyersIn "Do Your Divorce Right," . . .readers [are] given a step-by-step analysis . . . directly from two successful and well-respected family law judges. This book is an invaluable tool for understanding the divorce process.~Marlene Eskind Moses, Esq., Immediate Past-President, American Academy of Matrimonial LawyersDo Your Divorce Right is the best one volume legal compendium on the subject that wehave ever seen and it also is an invaluable general legal reference for all related matters inthe law. The Appendices and Glossary sections are excellent informative stand-alone sitesall by themselves . . .The New England Reviews of BooksLewis B. Sckolnick, Editor

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Product details

Paperback: 400 pages

Publisher: Tower Publishing (October 1, 2011)

Language: English

ISBN-10: 098279553X

ISBN-13: 978-0982795538

Product Dimensions:

7 x 0.8 x 10 inches

Shipping Weight: 1.6 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)

Average Customer Review:

5.0 out of 5 stars

13 customer reviews

Amazon Best Sellers Rank:

#1,623,392 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

It has taken me far too long to read this book. And now that I have, I know that I need several more copies.As a parish minister I have all too often been called on by couples who have decided that their union is no longer liveable. Even when both people have reached this same conclusion, it has been my experience that there are a great many questions. As the authors of this book point out in their Introduction, many (if not most) couples spend a tremendous amount of time planning the beginnings of their union -- thinking through their relationship and what it will mean to join their lives together. Not so the union's dissolution -- and the ramifications of that choice are at least as weighty. When people have sought me out at this time my resources were limited -- I could discuss the spiritual and emotional implications, even help the couple look at (some of) the practical ramifications, yet I was completely out of my depth when it came to the legal process. I didn't even know what questions people should be asking.In DO YOUR DIVORCE RIGHT Andrew Horton and John David Kennedy, both family court judges in Maine, have created a guide like none other I have seen. Their observations and advice are not theoretical, but born from their vast experience walking with real people through these difficult times. And if this book is not merely theory, neither is it "legalese." Both Horton and Kennedy obviously have compassionate souls beneath their judges robes, and I was extremely pleased to see among the issues they encourage couples to consider are the legal, financial, emotional, AND SPIRITUAL dimensions. And they do so in ways that are respectful of both religious and "non"-religious folk.In fact, "respectful" would be a good word to sum up the tone of DO YOUR DIVORCE RIGHT. Never assuming the reader has a level of information that they may not have, nor that any concept is too complex for the lay person to understand, Horton and Kennedy strike a beautiful balance between information and accessibility. This is an extremely READABLE book, especially important because during tough times like the contemplation of divorce people may be in shock or denial. DO YOUR DIVORCE RIGHT is aimed to help the very people who so desperately need a guide at such a time.And that's why I want several copies -- I want to be able to take it off my shelf and offer it to a couple who tell me that their union is on the rocks. This book compassionately offers the information they may need -- in specific and concrete ways -- while encouraging them to take the time to truly think through the process on which they're about to engage. There are check lists, charts, stories, and answers -- answers to "frequently asked questions," if you will, as well as answers to the questions that often go unasked, to the detriment of the parties involved. This is an exceedingly valuable book and I am grateful to Andrew Horton and John David Kennedy for sharing both their wisdom and their compassion.Rev. Erik Walker WikstromOne more note: I feel it should be noted that the authors of DO YOUR DIVORCE RIGHT are very careful in their choice of words -- they recognize that not all divorces stem from the same sources or follow the same path, and they recognize as well that in todays world not all unions reflect the same heterosexist norms. This book would be useful for -- and respectful of -- people in heterosexual marriages, same-sex marriages and partnerships, and domestic partnerships of any orientation. I see this as a huge plus and, again, am grateful for their insight.

Have you ever watched an ugly divorce completely undo a couple or family you loved? Have you looked on helplessly as a potentially civil separation spiraled needlessly into a scorched earth campaign of mutual total destruction--emotional, financial and spiritual? Do you know someone trapped in a dangerously abusive relationship, or a stunned recipient of unexpected and unwelcome divorce papers? Have you been dragged into the role of confidant, consultant or co-conspirator and regretted your ignorance of the law and courts? Do you stand at that unhappy precipice yourself?Finally there's something really useful you can do for anyone teetering on the edge of divorce; as quickly as you can, put a copy of Do Your Divorce Right into the hands of both parties. The authors are both long-serving family court judges with a complete command of the law. More importantly, they're lifelong students of human nature in all its dysfunctional variety. Their book is an immensely practical but deeply compassionate guide to divorce as both legal process and uniquely traumatic life experience. It offers a rare combination of detailed how-to instruction with wisdom that could only come from a lifetime immersed in the wreckage of other lives. The hopeful assumption is that readers will seek a civilized humane separation, but there is careful attention to all the more combative realities.In a better world, none of us would need a book like Do Your Divorce Right. Until that world arrives, I'm adding it to my list of disaster preparedness essentials.

This is a wonderful tool for couples planning to divorce! The authors point out the basic fact that this event, sad as it may be, is at least as complicated as getting married and deserves the same detailed attention. This book gives straight forward, consise information on everything to consider and exactly how the courts will deal with the details. Every therapist, divorce mediator, divorce attorney and parent coach/educator should encourage clients to read this book. As a parent coach working with parents planning to divorce and on co-parenting after divorce, I plan to suggest this book to all of my clients.

This is a must read for anyone going through the legal process of divorce. It is well written and easily read. It makes sense and contains real world advice that does make the process easier and more readily understood. The last chapter "Starting Over, Achieving Peace" although at the end of the book sheds light on new beginnings. Ah ha, so there is hope. If there is a better book to help a husband or wife going through a divorce, I haven't found it.

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